The Mandala Center Logo (contains a medicine wheel image)

As we enter a new year I am thinking of the teachings of the Medicine Wheel (“medicine” being life’s lessons and” wheel” containing all that is) as I was taught by Grandmother Twylah Hurd Nitsch of the Seneca Nation.  

In the wheel the EAST is the sacred door – the place we enter and the place of new beginnings.  Our New Year season is often considered a time of such “new beginnings.”  In the EAST we find the rising sun (like the winter solstice returning the light to our world), the place of sacred birth and breath – not just physical birth but the birth of visions, dreams, goals, and ideas.   So we make New Year Resolutions to this end. 

The EAST is also the place of the winged ones; the eagle that sees far and wide over the land – the bigger picture. The eagle’s wings are spread open and its heart is exposed to the world.  This is where vision is born but that exposed heart puts us at risk at the same time.      

Have you ever had a dream or vision and shared it with others and then quickly realized they did not understand it?  Or worse yet, they found fault with it before you even had a chance to ponder it for yourself?    Did you ever have a great idea but did not follow through on it?  Or start a project but not complete it?  We can spend a lot of time dreaming about flying but we never leave the ground.  Habits, fear, disapproval of others, and self doubts can haunt us and lead us to unfulfilled and unrealized “soaring”. 

Finding the will power, courage and support to tap into our visions, while remaining grounded and connected to the world in sustainable ways, takes a lot of time and energy (and experience and faith).  It is not an easy path – as so many broken and failed New Year’s resolutions would confirm.   We can easily be distracted and deterred.  We may feel a need to be protective of our visions-which is exactly what we need to be- for this is a delicate place in the wheel of life.  But if we shelter them too much, for fear of failure, disapproval, or the need for perfection, we may never allow them to see the light of day. 

What visions are being born in your heart right now??  What have you imagined for this year of 2012 that is only now in its infant stage – in need of protection?   What calls to you to explore, develop, or change? What are some of the first “baby steps” you can take to make sure your visions/dreams/ideas survive into youth and maturity?

(At times like this some self-reflection is always helpful:  What (belief, situation, person) limits you and holds you back?  What energizes you?  Who supports you? Who steals your fire? What inspires you? What has worked or not worked in your past?) 

Visions can quickly turn into fantasies that obscure our sight so it is important to have a good grounding cord.  This cord is not meant to prevent us from passionate expressions but to keep us from soaring haphazardly and ultimately ineffectively.  We must exist in what seems like a paradox – to fly and yet remain firmly rooted in the earth.    

As we move from the EAST into the SOUTH in the Medicine Wheel we become more grounded.  We find the “medicine of mouse” which is to be low on the earth and see things up close where details matter.  The south is the place of our daily lives, work and family.  It is where we labor.  The east is only a temporary haven for dreams and visions.  They are born there but it is then our tedious job to tend to the details.  It is hard work. This may be physical work or it may be inner soul work that calls us to task about our own thoughts and beliefs.   Most often, it is both.

Our visions need time and space and most of all nurturing commitment in order to fully mature.  I have a sign in my art studio that says “I am your idea. If you do not pay attention to me today I will be gone tomorrow.”   A vision imagined is just a vision unless we can make it manifest in our lives – unless we act upon it. 

It is important to note, however, that this “action” may not be a quick impulse but rather a slow process of small steps taken over time.  Patience is a virtue.   It is also important to realize that we may end up someplace very different than we originally imagined, but this is not failure.  It is a natural state of creative flow that emerges and guides us when we allow ourselves to be guided while remaining full participants in our own lives.  A vision or idea is a starting point and from there many possibilities can be realized. 

So do not despair!!  We CAN bring our inspirations home and when we live into them we find the world around us makes room and offers support – making the circle bigger.  When we value our dreams and stand up for them we soon discover who we can entrust them to and who can help us temper and shape our dreams into realities.    Our dreams gain strength and stability.  People show up at the right time and opportunities, challenges (setbacks can be blessings), and resources light our way. 

This is a quote that Susan, a participant visiting The Mandala Center, left for me upon her departure,

 “The moment one definitely commits oneself then Providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one that would never have otherwise occurred…unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”  Goethe.

For those of you who are soaring in the EAST right now, who are opening up your hearts to new possibilities, I send prayers of support and hope that this New Year brings the wisdom you seek and the Providence you need.   May you make manifest the visions you hold dear – however large or small. 

Tish Hewitt and her daughter Anna Wolfe manifested their visions here and they have turned into The Mandala Center as we know it today.  It was a journey and a process.   Now we are building new visions and moving forward with new growth – in small steps and with great faith.   Your support of our vision and mission is a blessing!   Happy New Year! 

Lori Coon
Executive Director

by Monica Ingamells, Operations Manager

Winter Scene www.softpedia.com

The Winter storm has subsided and the morning air is biting but crisp and clear. Capulin Volcano rises majestically out of the surrounding plain, bathed in a serene morning light. All is quiet. Snow is piled high around the shoveled path to the Deer Lodge, where I spent the night. It is a delicious feeling to be out at The Mandala Center in the early morning hours instead of having to get into a cold car and drive 35 miles on icy roads to get here. Being here before the business of the day has started, I can see the beauty in coming here for a retreat; I feel like I’m on a retreat just because I spent the night! The morning light is most beautiful and reflects in blue and pink hews on the fallen snow. Shadows still deepen the landscape and I want to go for a walk in the growing morning light. The rising sun hits the top of Capulin Volcano and crowns it in white light. It is December 23^rd, and we will indeed have a White Christmas!

The snow squeaks under my boots and I put up the hood on the parka. A feeling of peace arises in me as I look around and listen to the silence. It is so very quiet on the mountain! Silence is such a rarity in today’s busy world. It is no wonder we have a difficult time hearing the Still, Small Voice inside that is always there to guide us. Christmas is a cherished time of the year for me, not because of gifts and food, carols and celebrations, but because of the treasured memories I have from family Christmases past. We may not have the date of Jesus’ birth correct the way we celebrate it, but that seems to be beside the point. The point is that celebrating Christmas is a tradition and we do it in His honor. Like so many other holy and sacred events we may have lost sight of the true reason for celebrating Christmas, and it has become more of a commercial feast than anything else, but if we stop even for a moment and turn a deaf ear to the clamor of last minute shopping we may just hear the call to gather together in worship and joy. There is magic in the air and it is there throughout the year whenever we stop enough to listen, to let it touch us. Take a moment today to let Love and Peace embrace you and Re-member what a holy time this is. Every day is holy. Every day is a wonder. Personally I may not always have been grateful for the gift of life, but right now, in this moment, I am.

 Wishing you all a Blessed Christmas
 and
a New Year filled with Health and Happiness, Peace and Prosperity.

Winter at The Mandala Center

Happy Holiday Greetings to Everyone!!

Last weekend we had our appreciation dinner for all the volunteers, staff, board members, and service professionals who help make The Mandala Center what it is. We want to thank you too for being part of The Mandala Center through your thoughts, your emails, your donations, and even for just coming here to check out our website!! It has been an eventful and fruitful year and we give thanks in so many ways.

NEW NEWS!! Our new website is online and we continue to make final adjustments. Soon we will be able to offer online registrations. We plan on offering some more photo galleries too!! Keep checking back in 2012 for updates.

Check out our 2012 Workshop Line Up! We have new presenters and topics to explore!

Our newsletter will be sent out at the beginning of January and if you are not on our list and wish to be, please email or call us to receive our newsletter. You may receive it via email or snail mail. Just let us know!!

Blessings to you!!
Lori Coon

One of our mandala windows within Casa Mandala

Recently, we hosted Charles Gilchrist, a talented mandala artist, for a workshop here at our Center.  The group of participants was incredible; dynamic, energetic, and lovely- every one of them- traveling from as far away as New York City, Washington State, and Paraguay, South America!  We miss their enthusiasm and vibrancy, and hope they’re all doing well, safely back in their respective homes.

While Charles was here he contemplated one of our cherished mandala windows, and provided for us a little sacred geometry in regards to their complex artistic design.  Reading Charles’s evaluation of the glass, after looking at this window day after day, enjoying its beauty, yet not immersing ourselves in the depth of its design, gave us pause.  How much of the sacred beauty of life is passed over in this regard? How much of the depth of our surroundings do we miss, because we’re too focused on the challenges of our daily routines?

Anyways, we’d love to share with you what he calculated for us, and hope that someday you’ll be here to marvel at it in person. Charles wrote—

Check out the fascinating and very complete numerological relationships to be found within this beautiful glass Mandala:
#1.  The Circle (Mandala) is always associated with unity, oneness, the holistic reality.
#2.  There are five Yin/Yang in this piece and, of course, the Yin/Yang is about duality (two-ness).
#3.  The center circle is divided into three equal parts (three-ness, trinity).
#4.  The center circle is surrounded by a square (four equal sides) which is connected to a cross (four-ness).  There are also four sequential rings to be found in this piece, along with four infinity glyphs and four lotus flowers (four-ness).
#5.  There are five Yin/Yang set in the fourth ring at the precise pentagon points (five-ness).  Also, each of the four Lotus flowers has five petals.
#6.  There is a hexagon (six equal sides) set just outside the second ring.  And there are also six flower-like forms connected to that hexagon (six-ness).
#7.   Each of these six flower-like forms is divided into seven equal petal parts (seven-ness).
#8.  There is a Octagon (eight equal sides) set just inside the second ring (eight-ness).
#9.  Each of the five Yin/Yang set within the fourth ring are surrounded by flower-like forms.  And each of these flowers has two unique sets of nine petals each (nine-ness).  And each Yin/Yang flower has a total of eighteen pedals (18 reduces to 9).  Also, the total number of petals in the five Yin/Yang is 90 which, of course, also vibrates nine (nine-ness).
#10.  There are ten axial devisions of this Mandala which are set in two sizes of petals running between the third and fourth rings (10 reduces to 1, Oneness).
#12.  Lastly, there are twelve feathers which twist and flow around the outer levels of this Mandala, an obvious reference to the astrological Map Of Time (12 vibrates 3).

What a beautifully conceived design!
Namaste,
Charles

Charles Gilchrist and the Sacred Geometry of Mandala Participants

Our dear friends from New Hampshire! South Church Mystics.

We recently enjoyed the great privilege of hosting a fabulous group of dear people all the way from Concord, New Hampshire. The Reverend Jed Rardin and his adventurous team of parishioners from the South Congressional Church traveled a total of 15 hours to come stay with us for a week. Those of us who work at The Mandala Center agree that the best part of our jobs is the honor of befriending some of the most compassionate, caring, dynamic people in the world. Our second favorite part is reading the evaluation forms when a group leaves… They are always so beautiful and insightful. They reflect the personal transformation which blossoms here on this sacred land. That we are able to witness this blossoming of the Human Spirit is a gift for which we are so grateful. 

Allow me to share some of these evaluations here. Nothing could describe The Mandala Center as well.

Have a beautiful day, wherever you are.

Kristy Sweetland, Social Media Marketing

“This place- the environment, the buildings & grounds, and THE STAFF (!!) are amazing, beautiful, & welcoming. Just the right gracious hospitality so that we may experience retreat in the fullest sense. I’ve never experienced such graciousness and beauty at a retreat center. Thank you!” – Leanne

“The spaciousness and freedom of this place are very conducive to resting and centering in God. I found myself able to let go of my pre-occupations, to let down my defenses, and open up to the presence of God. Whether sitting in centering prayer in the contemplation loft, walking the labyrinth, or just gazing out over the landscape feeling the sun and the wind, I was able to be still and know that God is God. My experience here has brought me a deeper awareness of God’s presence, constant care, and abiding love. I hope it will foster a deeper commitment to follow God’s way of peace and compassion.” – Lynne

“I came here feeling broken and left feeling peace and joy.” – Patricia

“This has been a wonderful 5 1/2 days in a setting that can’t be beat. The Mandala Center provides a beautiful center, with welcoming and competent staff, and gourmet dining. There was much time for reflection & silence. And, of course, the desert- always a sacred place for me. I came with a group of 11, all of whom I knew. But our time at TMC brought us much closer than I could have imagined. Truly a place of peace…” – Frank

“Land of enchantment indeed. The radical and generous hospitality of the staff was stunning!! The howling, whistling wind a ferocious and cleansing spirit.” - Emily 

“This is a sacred place that allowed me ‘the solace of a fierce landscape’, the peace of great beauty, and the opening of heart that is God’s deep love.” – Helen      

The Mandala Center Labyrinth

     The staff at The Mandala Center (TMC) has the great privilege of serving groups and individuals as they come and go. One thing we often notice is the visible signs of stress upon arrival, and the softer more relaxed faces smiling at us upon departure!  Another thing we notice is how the Center itself seems to “take on” each group’s dynamic –preparing to nurture whatever needs nurturing.

     Since my arrival at TMC I have thought a lot about the “power of place.”  TMC occupies land that seems to be grounding and yet offers this great expansive sky and the equal expanse of thought, possibility, and vision.  Some say the “power of place” arises out of the land itself but there is also significance in what the guests themselves bring to the Center. There is a union that takes place – a dance.  The visitors to TMC bring their own intentions and inspiration and become part of an ongoing community here through the deep work and hope that they generate.

     Recently TMC held the workshop titled Labyrinth: Pilgrimage of Prayer.  (To learn more about labyrinths go to www.labyrinthsociety.com)  On this particular weekend guests arrived with spirits high and a palpable anticipation. This group of individuals began to bond through their experiences in the retreat and by Saturday night I could see how “the place” and the “group intention” were merging.   On Saturday night I was reminded of how the dance is danced. 

     An indoor canvas labyrinth was placed in the sanctuary and candles were then lit throughout the room.   Outside the moon was full.   I was there to assist the group with the tasks of adjusting lights and watching candles – and it ended up being a gift for my own soul.  
     Lisa Moriarty, the workshop leader, explained that the group was going to engage in a meditative movement, a body prayer, or liturgical dance within the labyrinth.  To assist them Lisa played a CD called The Prayer Cycle, which contained beautiful music – prayers for healing- sung in many languages by various musical artists.  Participants could pick up scarves and create movement with color.   I sat off to the side but it was not long after the music started that I was fully aware of the “shift” taking place in the group as well as the space we occupied.

     The music was haunting and deep and seemed to come from a holy place. The silence of the participants elevated the sounds.   The low lights and candles gave a sense of warmth and comfort and sparked memories of a time when firelight was central to our survival.  Bodies slowly began to move and express their willingness to trust and be vulnerable.   A sense of reverence filled the space.   Time was standing still, senses were alert, intentions and prayers were being danced and embodied.  The living Mandala was awakened: the “power of place” and human intention united.   Tears edged my eyes as I watched, and love was awakened.

     I was pleased to find this quote by a Presbyterian Theologian, Daniel Deffenbaugh in an article by Jay Walljasper titled, “Finding my Soul through the Power of Place.” Deffenbaugh said,  “God is present in all things. The eternal breaks into ordinary time and space.”  Walljasper continues by saying, “…this helps us to discover what is sacred everywhere else in the world.”  

     While TMC holds a special “energy” ripe for contemplation and expansive thought, the people who journey here bring an unmistakable ingredient – a willingness to explore, to be vulnerable, to trust in something greater than themselves, to have hope, and to have a love and curiosity that allows Spirit to move around them and within them.   It is my deepest hope that the guests who visit The Mandala Center find the sacred within themselves and “discover what is sacred everywhere else in the world.”

Lori Coon, Executive Director

What would life be like if we just simply accepted change and embraced impermanence?  There are many people who say it is imperative for us to realize that “change” is the only constant in life if we wish to know peace within.  When we try to control everything, we find everything controls us.  This may be something to consider. 

Recently, I watched a film called The Dhamma Brothers.  It is a documentary about a group of prisoners at a maximum security prison who had the opportunity to experience Vipassana – a Buddhist practice of sitting and observing one’s own thoughts and sensations.  While it is a method and teaching of the Buddha it is not a “religion” but a technique that reminds us of how we create our own suffering and how we respond to our sensations and thoughts in ways that induce suffering.  It is a pathway to stop the chatter, observe the body and mind, and move toward greater understanding of equanimity, impermanence, and acceptance. 

All things change. They come into being and they move out of being. All things are impermanent except the eternal – which is called by many names – God, Soul, Buddha Nature, the Unified Field, Oneness, Great Mystery, Love.   Moving past our reactive or habitual patterns of response to change –especially unanticipated change – can be a skill that enhances the quality of our life and relationships. You probably have heard the Serenity Prayer, a pillar of many Twelve Step programs:  God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference. This is a powerful prayer.   

What struck me most was the end of the film when the inmates talked about how the practice had changed their lives.

• I can remain calm enough, long enough, in a given situation so that I can decide how I want to respond rather than just reacting out of my fear and anger.
• I realized that even though I will probably live the rest of my life in this prison I have a choice to create a good and peaceful environment to live in – even here. 
• All I am doing is sitting with myself and observing my body and mind.  Now I realize things change all the time, but I can sit quietly.   Our teacher told us it is about having love, compassion, and forgiveness for ourselves in each changing moment.  I think I am becoming a better person because of it.
• It has helped my relationship with my family. I can see how things really are and not how I want them to be. I can take responsibility  for myself and recognize how I influence the people around me.

When I think about the comments made by the prisoners in the film I feel hopeful.  I think they shared an experience we could all thrive in – a greater sense of personal responsibility, the ability to accept change and impermanence, the skill of peacefully observing our own emotions, and the willingness to practice patience, love, and gratitude….sounds like a glimpse of heaven to me.

Life is about allowing the full impact of happiness and pain to move through us in the moment but never holding onto either one…knowing each will come and pass in its own time….and we can support each other in this human process of unfolding – in the best and the worst of situations – just like the Dhamma brothers did.

Lori Coon

Executive Director
The Mandala Center

On a recent walk in nature at Sugarite Canyon State Park, not far from The Mandala Center, I happened upon a place strewn with turkey feathers. The place was quite evidently the scene of an apparent tragedy where the turkey lost the fight. I say “apparent” because our human nature is to label death as a tragedy and in many cases that is how it feels when death visits us in our lives. I picked a handful of feathers as if I’d picked a bunch of flowers. Their softness and warmth against my hand was surprising and I ventured further into the bushes in the hopes of maybe finding a big feather blown in there by the wind. I found more than a feather – I found the turkey. Or rather what was left of it. Never having seen one up close I bent down to look at it and I marveled at the beautiful colors of its cloak and the intricacy of its feathers. Despite the abrupt end to its life the turkey looked peaceful and it caused me to think of the endless cycle of life and death that is so evident in nature. Having recently experienced a great personal loss I sat with my thoughts on life and death and with the aching beauty and mystery of life. The perfection of each feather I was stroking reminded me of everything that is good and beautiful in life and for a moment total peace embraced me. The power of nature to touch my soul is a gift I am tremendously grateful for.

            Death may be the part of life we don’t easily make friends with but it is there nonetheless. A few weeks ago a friend and guest at The Mandala Center shared some of his thoughts on what he called “the weird animal” of grief with me and he also shared two poems that I found so forceful and compelling that I want to share them with all of you and especially with those of you who have been visited by loss and grief. I hope you find as much consolation in them as I did.

-Monica Ingamells, Operations Manager

Separation by W. S. Merwin

Your absence has gone through me

Like thread through a needle.

Everything I do is stitched with its color.

Sonnet XCIV by Pablo Neruda

If I die, survive me with such sheer force

that you waken the furies of the pallid and the cold,

from south to south lift your indelible eyes,

from sun to sun dream through your singing mouth.

I don’t want your laughter or your steps to waver,

I don’t want my heritage of joy to die.

Don’t call up my person. I am absent.

Live in my absence as if in a house.

Absence is a house so vast

that inside you will pass through its walls

and hang pictures on the air.

Absence is a house so transparent

that I, lifeless, will see you, living,

and if you suffer, my love, I will die again.

Capulin

It is interesting how I will be mulling over 2-3 ideas for topics to write about on the blog and then one day – one just falls in my lap. Clear and crisp.  Today that is exactly what happened.   I got an email from Ronnie, my contact at Golf Associates.  They print our rack cards for us.   Our rack cards say “a place for rest and renewal” and Ronnie asked me about my interpretation of the word “renewal.”  I had really not thought about it how we were using this term in our marketing.  So this was a good question for me.  For Ronnie, I knew he had mentioned needing some rest and retreat a few weeks ago and my gut was telling me that Ronnie was  asking more than a simple question. He was searching for something inside himself and needing confirmation.

I think this is what many people are doing when they come to The Mandala Center.  They are seekers, searchers, thinkers, and pilgrims and they have both the questions and the answers – but they need the time, the space and their own permission to quiet the heart and mind and listen within.

So this was my response to Ronnie this morning…..(slightly elaborated on now)

Ronnie,

What do you think renewal means? What does it mean to you?   Since this word has you thinking my guess is – the concept wants to communicate with you; teach you something; get your attention.   Or perhaps you are seeking something and that word – renewal- resonates with what you are seeking.

For many people who come to TMC – it is a place of rest and retreat in a general sense – but most people who come here are doing something more conscious.  They are seeking.  They are trying to grow or better themselves.  They want to learn something or discover something about themselves.  They are asking hard questions.    Sometimes they are just burned out and need to rest but usually they find  amazing “insights” come with the process too.

Often we can get bogged down in life.  Routine takes over.  Habits form.  Boredom sets in.  We get beaten down.  Forget who we are.  Misplace what we really love. We can be like a flower beaten down in a storm. (note: The storm brings both life giving water and challenge in the face of change.)  Yet with sunlight and time the plant can revive itself…renew itself…. it can flower again.

We also can come to a place or time in our lives where we need to find “renewal” and revive our deepest sense of self and passion in life.   We may need to renew our commitment to take care of ourselves.  We may need to renew our bodies by changing the way we eat and exercise so we have more energy.   Maybe we need to renew a belief, our faith, or a hobby.  Maybe we need to renew a friendship or renew our long term commitments that still work for us but perhaps we took for granted.   In that way renewal is like coming home to “yourself “again —.opening up to life —fanning a spark — living fully again.

Through renewal we start to engage in our lives and take responsibility rather than feel tossed and torn helplessly by life’s tempest winds.  We dedicate ourselves through renewal.  We all need a little TLC and many times we need to be our own true love.   We can hold space for ourselves to rest, heal, learn, create, dream, and ultimately put ourselves in a constant state of renewal.   Every moment we are born again into the present.   We are not the same person we were a year ago, nor even a moment ago.  Renewal is a constant state of being.  It is the evolution of the Self.  Being conscious and grateful for this state of renewal offers us awe, wonder, excitement and richness  – if we only take the moment to greet it.

Certain times of our lives may also call for a direct experience with renewal – which is not always an easy path.  Renewal is part of a process.  In this way renewal can be as gentle as remembering how much you love walking in the rain or it can be as transformational as setting a new direction for your life’s journey.

Sometimes renewal is part of transformation and it may require letting go of old modes of being that no longer work, or letting go of relationships we have outgrown, or letting go of a belief that has held us back too long.   This can be a challenging time – this time of growth – and it can come at any age, but the rewards of bursting into a state of renewed commitment to your own life – or even a renewed commitment to remember to laugh each day – can inspire all of us to do the same.

In peace,

Lori Coon
Executive Director

Our Meditation Room set up at The Mandala Center

This past November I had the good fortune to participate in a meditation retreat at The Mandala Center, led by Don Handrick of Santa Fe’s Thubten Norbu Ling Tibetan Buddhist Center.   Although I have read nearly every book published on Zen Buddhism over the past fifteen years, my practice has remained completely unstructured and ritual-free; something I felt I needed to remedy.  My ego, or spirit, or body- perhaps a collaboration- began to nag that I wasn’t disciplined enough in my spirituality.  I wasn’t trying hard enough.  I was lazy.  So, to jumpstart my new-found commitment to a more solid spiritual foundation, I eagerly signed up for this four-day silent meditation retreat on the Four Immeasurables.  I was a little intimidated.  I’d never done anything like this before, but I brushed off the insecurity and allowed myself to wear that ‘beginner’ title proudly.  I understood that unless I was willing to take the risk and try, I’d never progress.

So I jumped in, and found it remarkably difficult; more so than I imagined, in fact.

Around day three (after nearly eight hours of sitting meditation a day) I found myself in the middle of a meditation on compassion, struggling with so active a mind I thought I’d never find my way back to internal silence. I began to feel angry with myself.  Surrounded by a group of people seemingly so deep within their own peaceful mindfulness, I began to compare myself to those who could do this, feeling as though I could not. The attempts to suppress the constant battle I found myself embroiled within began to exhaust me.  So as our teacher had instructed, I called on the image of Chenrezig, the Bodhisattva of compassion, to help me. I envisioned this glowing Divine Being floating in the air above me and I asked him to flood me with the light energy of acceptance and compassion- for myself.

At that moment, a beautiful thing happened.

I heard a loud knock on the window of our nature-surrounded meditation room.  It was more than a knock really – it was more like a small jackhammer pounding at lightning speed.  I tried to stay focused, but it only got louder.  I cracked my eye open a tiny bit to see if anyone else was curious about this intrusion.  Nobody seemed to notice.  They all remained quiet as little Buddhas, deeply within their own contemplative serenity.  And then, as the pounding got louder and louder, it was as if time stood still and I was the only witness to a very personal moment.

I quietly turned around, eyes unapologetically open, to see what was behind me.  There, clinging to the adobe wall, pounding on the window frame was the most glorious orange Flicker.  His little head was cocked to the side and he seemed to be staring me directly in the eye.  I imagined he did this upon direct guidance from Chenrezig himself and pictured him enquiring as to the nature of his summons- “Which one of you called for me?”  I nearly ignited with joy. The Flicker is my birthday totem on the Medicine Wheel; one of my very favorites of the avian species and a totem symbol of spiritual harmony and rapid growth. It was as if I received the direct message that I was more than fine.  On the journey of our own spirituality there is no ‘wrong’ way to progress.  It is only our own overactive, internal critic which tells us so.

Perfect imperfection.  A step forward is beautiful no matter how clumsy.  And I believe at the dawn of the brand new year, amidst the swirl of resolutions, this is an important reminder for all of us.

Kristy Sweetland
Marketing Assistant at The Mandala Center